bla bla bla

i wonder where did my weekend go..it just vanished without a trace and monday is here. tomorrow, when i get up, i will ask myself again, what on earth are you doing? i cant beleive i struggled for four years just to torture myself like this. ahh..what am i complaining? im just an industrial trainee..yeah yeah..i know..that's what they all say..everyone's problem is big to the respective individual..so i guess mine is pretty huge for me.

no, i dont care about the work. im almost doing the work of a normal employee there with deadlines everyday. i just feel the agony of seeing certain faces back in the company. i get so stressed out until i can't eat and i gobble bars after bars of chocolate just to soothe my depression. i just can't beleive jerks exists in this world.

without music to accompany me, i think i would have been a lunatic by now. i just keep asking myself howcome i didnt become deaf with the volume all hiked up, wishing i can tune it up higher and higher, limitless.

what the heck was i thinking? nevermind, it's all a part of the learning process but something puzzles me though..how long must i keep learning? what's the use anyway? the knowledge wont take me anywhere. everything is just a big piece of waste.

what am i doing? oh.. just what am i doing?